They say "you can not serve two masters at the same time"...

I totally agree that it's hard to do so.... but "the can't" is but a relative word.

It is not totally impossible to do both if you have the passion and determination.

Though, I often wonder how life would be less complicated, not to mention stressful, should I only be studying and not working at the same time.  

I know and I imagine how much time I could devout then to my second course and the probability of excelling all the more in the later field.  

However, I could not forgo the perks which i I also enjoy "with being employed".  Such that as a working student, monthly salary has been serving as the means of subsidizing my studies and sustaining the lifestyle that I have.

It is hard to juggle everything, but I must admit that it makes the journey not only challenging...but fulfilling as well.

Ganon talaga

"Sinasabi ko minsan na itigil na to...katulad ng sinasabi ng marami.  Kahibangan.  Katangahan.  Pero kung paano ko gagawin hindi ko alam.  Ang alam ko lang sinusunod ko lang kung anung sinasabi ng nararamdaman ko.  Maliban doon...hindi ko na alam.  Gustuhin ko man.  Hindi ko magawa."

they say that God listens to our prayers...even before we say it, he knows what our heart desires...

i know God knows my prayer...

SO WHAT?!

after all these years...

i never get tired....

why would i?

guess they will never understand why...

should i care?

i have given up controlling what i feel...

it doesn't make me any happy...

now im just taking the risk

giving without receiving...and becoming happy out of it....no matter how ridiculous it may seem to be.

i won't care if this will cause me pain...again

i've been there so many times...and i've manage to get up...why should i be afraid now?

there's no learning...there's no rationalizing of things...

because at the end of the day...it is not your reason that shall prevail...

IT IS WHAT YOU FEEL...

and i don't want to live a life full of "what if" 

for once...

i just wanna be true to myself...

Listenin' to NEVER BE THE SAME

It was good for me
It was good for you
Now nothing either of us can say or do
Can change the way you feel tonight
Sometimes love just slips out of sight

Just one thing before you go
Just one thing that you've got to know
No one will ever touch me that way
The way that you did that very first day


And I'll
Never be the same without you here
I'll live alone
Hide myself behind my tears
And I'll
Never be the same without your love
I'll live alone
Try so hard to rise above


The years go by
There's always someone new
To try and help me forget about you
Time and again it does me no good
Love never feels the way that it should


I loved you then I guess I'll love you forever
And even though I know we could never stay together
I think about how it could have been
If we could just start all over again


It was good for me
It was good for you
Now nothing either of us can say or do
Can change the way you feel today
Sometimes love just slips away 

I miss my friend...

I'm not sure if he will still be able to read this ( unless I decided one day to delete this entry)

..I just do miss him.

We have shared a good friendship together and for all those times I have been sincere with the care I showed him.

He is one person I am thankful I have come across in this world..

and will keep him forever in my heart.

I thank him for teaching me how to love unconditionally with out expecting my feelings to be reciprocated...not at all.

I am happy to have him as a dear friend and happy to love him in silence.

I am sooo happy and proud of what he has become...

I know I will miss him when the time comes that our priorities would ask us to be apart and that we shall live our lives separately...

well, just the thought of it makes me cry

but I know I shall embrace it when it comes

and be happy for whatever fate leads us...

just now...I already miss him

I want to live each day as a new day..

free from anxiety and skepticism.

I want to keep the hope in me...that things will fall on its right place

and that I will fit right in the puzzle of this so called life.

know I need not to please everybody...

but I want to touch people's lives in such a way that mem'ries of me

are thoughts that they would always love to remember.

...I want to live life as if I'm opening a gift every minute...

flabbergasted with the surprise it brings me

thankful for the grace...

generous to share.

I want to wake up each day as if I am bound to receive blessings the rest of the day...

 

They say life rewards our actions and minds....

...but how come bad things happen to good people?

Unfathomable

Life answers in the most profound and mysterious ways...

Admit it! We all get nutty when it comes to it once in our life. A lot of times what we say contradicts what we do. We become oblivious to foresee things that could make us falter down our knees and beg for the things we know would never even happen at all. We cling on with the illusion or fantasy that we have built ourselves.  We deny and we pretend just to cover up the misery but at the end of the day we cry our eyes out for desolation. We have experienced trying to heal the wounds which seem to only get worse every time we do so. We resort to isolation but seem to never even find ourselves. There are times when we thought we have gotten back but thought later that we are wrong. 

…But nevertheless, we get up whatever it costs us…we get back….we hope….we risk….and we try again.  That is what we are…that is what it is…. No matter how much we try to rationalize things we find no answers not even a clue.  No matter how much we try to control our feelings we end up giving in to it forgetting the reason…just being with the moment. 

That how it is…

We can only describe it….

…but can never explain why.

 

Find a person who will respect you not because of what you have achieved,

rather find someone who respects you because he believes that you are worthy of it.

Find a person who will accept you not because of what that person thinks you will become, rather find someone who accepts the real you.

Find a person who will love you not because of what you have,

rather find someone who will still love you even if you lose all that you have.