I just wish to attain my freedom again...
to freed myself from imprisonment of anxiety
I am no saint neither a martyr...my friend said, to ever think about other people
before even thinking of my own sake
but there's something keeping me to do that now...maybe for now
I just want to be my old "me"
Life is indeed a long journey of proving myself..not so to other people
but to by very own self!
I don't want to take it as a struggle
but a process.
When people have the notion that you can plant a tree
they will forever test your ability if you can really do so...
criticize you and your plants
and even your garden.
Some will try to think of every possibility just so to discourage you
and to condition you and other people who knows the same that you can not.
Then it becomes a battle between yourself and your inner being....not anymore against them.
They will try to kill the notion they once knew
and if you allow it to happen....they may even kill the true you.
And if they see that you are not discouraged...keep an eye on your garden.
I have always believe that everyone is good per se....
But now I have realized....some are compelled to do evil
not only by other people...but also by the struggle they have among themselves.
It is a choice to be the planter who is being criticize or the one that makes the criticism.
But we also have the choice to be neither....that is if we can have a great life despite the shit that other people is throwing on us.
...and to do so can only start within.